Emails from Heck


O'Fest 2000 Part 1
Set your BMW Clock
Audi Donuts
Be a man
BMW \\\W3 Badge
Der Chevette
Porridgehead #1
E36M3s Suck
Great White Smoke
Great White II
Driving School
New Page 1
On Turning 40

Most of the stuff that I've written has been as a result of email. It has given me a forum to test voices, modes, miens, traits and a whole bunch of other stuff that I neither understand nor even know the names of. In essence, I just shoot from the hip and damn if I care where the bullets land.  Sometimes it's good, others it's pure rot. It is, however, rarely boring.

Much of this was published on the UUCDigest, an email board for BMW enthusiasts. UUC stands for Underground Upgrade Club which is the notion that sometimes working on improving your car is best kept from your spouse especially if it involves copious amounts of money. This actually has nothing to do with what goes on in the digest, it was just the way that it started. 

 Some of these messages require a bit of context to understand what the hell is going on. Still others, no amount of explanation will ever adequately convey what I was thinking at the time. Those that can be explained have a brief set up in italics at the beginning of the passage. Those that  I can't explain, well, you're on your own. Good stinking luck.